CULTURAL COMPARISONS

Since my first year here, I have been a member of the Toulouse chapter of the association France États-Unis. It was founded in 1945 as an apolitical organization, private and independent under the auspices of the Ministry of Foreign Affairs and the American Embassy to promote a better understanding between the French and Americans. We meet monthly for drinks and conversation at the Crown Plaza Hotel near Place Capitol in Toulouse. It’s always a nice social outing, the pandemic notwithstanding.

The Toulouse chapter of France États-Unis sponsors social outings throughout the year like July 4th, Fête National (known to most Americans – but not the French – as Bastille Day), and Thanksgiving dinner. It also sponsors two partial scholarships for French students planning to study in the US. It is a good organization to support.

Occasionally there are requests for volunteer presentations in various settings. I like being an ambassador and volunteer when I see them arise. The first experience was a visit to the University of Toulouse in December, 2021 where I was interviewed by English language students taking a class to become professional translators in formal settings. It was great fun.

Last month France États-Unis received another request to speak to a combined group of two English language classes at a collège (middle-school) in Quint-Fonsegrives just outside of Toulouse on March 17. The occasion was English Week with a number of activities slated. I volunteered and was invited.

My primary contact from the collège invited me to attend a concert that was to precede my presentation. A chorus of maybe 30 kids from the second-level class sang four different popular songs: Hey Jude, Don’t Worry, Be Happy; Louis Armstrong’s beautiful hit A Wonderful World and Oh, Happy Day. The songs brought back nice memories and I became quite moved. In fact, in the process I actually felt a rare pang of homesickness (J’avais le mal du pays).

Following the short concert, there was a change of classes as the third-level class students came into the activity room. As the chorus gathered their things to leave, I told them that I am American, that I had enjoyed their music, and that it had made me a little homesick. Feeling the emotion, the little girl standing next to me (maybe 9 or 10 years old) reached up to console me by patting my arm. I was touched.

Because of strict privacy laws in France protecting the rights of individuals, it is not possible to show the photo I took of the chorus. But trust me, they were cute and the concert heartwarming.

When it came time to actually write the presentation, I had a hard time coming up with what I wanted to say. I didn’t want to entangle the kids in the current political chaos. I therefore put out a request via Facebook to family and friends to get some ideas.

Digesting all this input, I spent two weeks building the presentation deciding to include most of the suggested topics. When I did a dry run, I found I could complete the presentation in about 30 minutes. I was told to speak for 45 minutes leaving some time for questions, so I felt pretty confident that it would be fine as there are always stops and starts.

I first defined What is an American? If you’ve ever had this discussion with someone from Brazil or literally any other country in the Western Hemisphere, you know that they consider themselves American too (South Americans, Central Americans, etc.). So I pointed that out, but concluded that US citizens are often simply called Americans.

I told them that the US is the third most populous country after China and India. Our most populous states are California (39 million) and Texas (29 million) with the economy of California being the 5th largest in the world.

Then I talked about E pluribus unum and how we are comprised of many immigrant nationalities and that my own mother is a Canadian immigrant. We also discussed race and how Asians and Hispanics are the fastest-growing segments, while the White segment is the slowest. Hence our internal strife and the emergence of controversial white supremacy.

The US is also a nation of multiple languages with English and Spanish being predominant. Yet I made the point that one needs to know English to succeed professionally.

I described my Michigan roots and the Great Lakes. (Did you know the Great Lakes comprise 21% of all freshwater lakes in the world?).

I also explained the origin of the name Detroit (from the French de troit translated meaning of the narrows indicating the narrow Detroit River between Lake Erie and Lake St. Clair feeding into Lake Huron). I have since discovered that the word détroit is a noun meaning a strait.

Then I answered the question as to why I am in France explaining first my French-Canadian roots, then my mother’s paternal ancestry dating back three centuries to Champagne, Touraine and Burgundy. Jokingly I said J’ai fait le retour (I made the return) which is effectively true.

I told them about my lifelong fascination with the language that grew into a love for the country and its history. And the more I came to France be it for work or pleasure, the more I wanted to simply live here. Eventually travel to France just wasn’t enough.

Of course, these being middle-school children, I didn’t get into the deeper reasons for why I love France. Politically I favor the socialist mentality. I like that people are well-provided for, that there are safety nets in society so that people can maintain their lives with a semblance of dignity. I like the humility of the French and the fact that they are far less ostentatious (moins ostentatoire). People don’t parade their wealth and possessions. That is also true for housing and cars. Their wardrobes are chic, but simple and not excessive. Quality, not quantity is pervasive. There is respect for all people regardless of income, status or neighborhood. Living in France removes a lot of social pressure to conform.

I showed pictures to the collègiens of my family’s trip to France in 2000 celebrating my mother’s 75th birthday explaining to them how I wanted to open up the minds of my nieces and nephews to a world larger than they had seen, and to a culture from which they had not-so-distant ties.

I spoke of how Detroit and the state of Michigan still depict their French heritage with names like Kercheval (a street in Detroit), Bois Blanc Island, Sault Sainte-Marie, L’Anse Creuse and Marquette.

Then I tried to show them the vastness of the US with its multiple regions, its 423 national parks, the photos of some of the places I have lived (Seattle with Mount Rainier looming on a clear day and Jersey City with its proximity to Manhattan) and a list (with accompanying photos) of my favorite US cities: Honolulu, Seattle, New York, Chicago, Boston & Cape Cod, Washington DC, Philadelphia, New Orleans & Miami.

I told them how Americans have a great fondness and affection if not romance for France in terms of its food, wine, culture, fashion, films, history and language. And how the Alliance Francaise plays a big role globally in promoting French language education and the French culture.

Then we discussed some of the cultural differences as they were quite curious about this particular topic.

Families in the US are often separated by long distances due to job relocation and personal preference.

Families in the US often don’t eat together because of varying schedules, extracurricular commitments and, for the parents, long working hours. And we eat dinner much earlier in the US compared to France.

When food is served in the US, it is often all brought to the table at the same time as opposed to France where courses are usually served one at a time. Meals often take much longer in France due to this practice as well as a slower pace where savoring every item and moment is de rigeur.

The American consumption of food is less healthy with junk food (mal bouffe) and super-sized portions being prominent in many diets. Americans eat less bread presumably because American loaf-style bread just doesn’t compare to a fresh baguette.

Americans love beef in all forms: hamburgers and steaks. I spoke about Delmonico’s Restaurant in New York City and their Delmonico steak. Cuts of beef in France are different and not aged as they are in the US. Hence I find that steaks are not as tasty here. I pine for a good steak when I return to the US for a visit. But I’m happy to report that a desire for hamburgers in France is on the rise though I have yet to find the perfect American-style burger.

And of course, we Americans have an addiction to sugar. Not that the French don’t like sweets, but our birthday cakes are far more extravagant and the oft-heard comment is that they are “trop de sucre” (too sugary). The French are also moderate in their intake. So while the temptations are there, the French are very strict about quantity and frequency in consuming these kinds of foods.

Another example of American extravagance was provided in terms of the infamous Sunday brunch. For we Americans, it is a food bonanza. For a French person, there is surprise at the excess.

I illustrated a Thanksgiving dinner menu and how, aside from the requisite turkey, stuffing, cranberries and sweet potatoes, we have not one, but usually several desserts in the form of pumpkin, pecan and/or mincemeat pies.

When it comes to holidays, there are big differences.

The US has 11 official holidays: New Year’s Day, Martin Luther King Day, Presidents Day, Memorial Day, Independence Day, Labor Day, Columbus Day/Indigenous American Day, Veterans Day, Thanksgiving Day, and Christmas Day.

France has 12 official holidays: New Year’s Day, Easter Sunday, Easter Monday, Labor Day (May 1), Victory in Europe (May 8), Ascension Day, Whit Monday, Fête National, Assumption, All Saints, Armistice Day (November 11 and the equivalent of our Veterans Day), and Christmas Day.

The first big difference is for students in that they enjoy les vacances scolaires several times through the school year (Fall, Winter & Spring), each two weeks long in addition to a Christmas break, also of two weeks duration. The summer vacation is similar to the US being about 8 weeks long. But it doesn’t begin until late June/early July with a return to school early September.

The second major difference is for the employed. French worker benefit from five weeks vacation from the very start of employment!

Shopping in France is quite different compared to the US. Aside from strip malls, malls do not exist in France.

Most smaller stores and businesses close for lunch for usually 90 minutes to two hours or more. Examples are our local butcher which closes at 1 PM but doesn’t re-open until 4 PM, and the local épicerie which closes from 12:30-3:30 PM. Finally, everything closes at 7:30 PM. There are no stores open 24 hours/day aside from a rare pharmacy.

Some local businesses (usually épiceries and boulangeries) will be open Sunday mornings but will close by 12:30 or 1 PM. They may also take a full or half-day off during the week. I learned very quickly when to do my shopping because I forgot that my local épicerie which provides locally sourced eggs, is closed on Wednesday and Sunday afternoons.

Customer service in France is somewhat infamous. In the US, we have the mottos “Service with a smile” and “The customer is always right.” Not so in France. There is a distinct attitudinal difference and la politesse is très important. If manners aren’t played out appropriately, one can be assured of bad service. And the eagerness to serve (l’ardeur) just doesn’t exist like it does in the US.

Which brings us to the work ethic.

In France, people work fairly rigid hours whereas in the US, long hours are often the rule. The French standard is a 35-hour work week compared to the US standard of 40 hours/week. The French don’t live to work. Rather, they truly work to live. And they are healthier for it. They value their extended lunch hours and vacation time and protect them vigorously.

With regard to customer service, I gave the example of trying to get estimates for work done at my home. The first big challenge is finding a reputable professional. The next challenge is getting the contractor to come and take a look. Then, it may take weeks to receive an estimate – if ever. I’ve had many contractors show up and never get back to me because, for some reason, they decided they didn’t want to do the work. But they never let me know…. Frustrating!

Education in the US is far more liberal. Students are not limited to areas of study and can change their minds as often as they like whereas in France, based on assessed aptitude and multiple exams, students are targeted at a relatively early point as to whether they will be on professional or technical career paths and even in which discipline. Once that path is established, it can be very difficult to change in France. And their performance on the standardized exams will determine the schools they may attend with the best schools in France obviously admitting only the highest achieving students. I was recently told that this is changing somewhat, but there is still less flexibility.

The good news in France is that higher education is largely paid for by the government. The bad news in the US is that it isn’t. I showed, using my alma mater of the University of Michigan as an example, the current cost of a degree in euros for residents and non-residents:

I actually ran out of time at this point and didn’t have a chance to comment on the gun culture that exists in the US. I told the teachers they could finish my presentation as they wished in another class. But what I wanted to say was that sadly, there are some who believe having a gun is necessary. That America is in transition and has lost credibility in recent years as the beacon of democracy (le phare de la démocratie). It is hard to say how it will evolve, but democracy is being threatened by fascism and authoritarianism.

Based on a question I was asked in the few minutes remaining, I summarized my overall impressions by saying that both countries are interesting. Both countries are beautiful. No country is perfect, but administratively France seems to be better organized and functions well. Examples are how one is able to pay taxes and handle many administrative issues – even driver’s licenses – online.

I also told them that I love my country but I love France too. And, as I do say frequently, I told them how much I love la politesse that exists in France. Manners count and how the French play that out is always impressive – even down to the smallest of children who are trained from an early age.

l also love the natural beauty of France and I love the history that surrounds us. In my retirement, France is providing a stimulating environment in which to explore the past and the present.

What is the bottom line?  (Pour moi, quelle est la ligne de fond?) 

For me, it is this: The beauty of the Pyrenées to which I arise every mountain, the simplicity and tranquility of village life with lovely neighbors who suffer through and help me with my French, and the intellectual stimulation make life perfect. May the adventure continue.